Review: Epcot's Test Track Ride (Presented by Chevrolet)

Since it is still technically the holiday season and since Orlando's Walt Disney World resort is one of the largest theme parks and tourist destinations in the world, I thought it only necessary to share my thoughts on the all new Test Track ride (presented by Chevrolet) at the Epcot theme park, which I rode. Backtracking for a moment; Test Track, originally opened in 1999 as a high-speed thrill ride taking you through the in's and out's of a GM test facility, letting riders experience first-hand how a pre-production vehicle went through the rounds of high-intensity testing before making its way into showrooms. Having rode the original, a cool concept delivered with a cheesy Disney theme and loads upon loads of General Motors plugs blah blah blah. Thankfully, this revised version upped the cool factor, kept the cheesy Disney theming and did away with GM plugging…to replace it with only Chevy ones– go figure. But unlike the previous model of the Test Track ride, the all-new updated Tron-looking version was much more hands on for the rider. In fact, waiting in line for the ride itself, you are taken into a special "design room," (I guess) to create your very own Chevrolet concept. Depending on how you pull and stretch the set design, determines power, agility, efficiency, aerodynamics, etc. Mine (pictured below) was beautiful, magenta and completely useless.
Review: Epcot's Test Track Ride (Presented by Chevrolet)
After the initial design stage is complete, you take a seat into a speciality "test vehicle," which goes through the same number of tests as the original, with a new theme and a few more new bits. After each test, your vehicle was rated best to worst, each time mine being dead last. Shows what I know about design. I assumed the sparkles would help aerodynamics. My design flaws aside, when indoor testing was completed, you take a high-speed run (of 66 mph) outdoors around a circular track Disney style and finish off back where you started. Again, my vehicle coming in as 'slower than shit.' Overall, for a Disney ride, it wasn't completely terrible. It moves fast, it jerks you around and it lets you get more hands on then usual. I could have done without all the Chevy plugging, but then again, that would have left me with no reason to write this droll and uninteresting review in the first place...which I thank you for reading. Also, Epcot is the only Disney park that serves alcohol, so go there.

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