Car rental clerk: I see you’re renting this Range Rover Sport on behalf of W. Chump & Sons Ltd. That’s the production company behind The Grand Tour, isn’t it?

Customer: Why yes, it is. Good knowledge.

Clerk: Thank you, but, err, can I just ask exactly what you’ll be using the car for?

Customer: Certainly. We’ll just be using it as a crew car. We’ve got a big shoot coming up and the crew want a car that’s comfy and spacious to get around in.

Clerk: You won’t be taking it off-road?

Customer: No, we’re just filming a road trip between two cities.

Clerk: Right, okay. It’s just we don’t allow our cars to be taken off-road, so if you do and any damage is done, it isn’t covered by the insurance.

Customer: I understand. Look, I can’t guarantee a candy bar won’t get mashed into the carpet, but I can say it definitely won’t be taken off-road.

Clerk: Are you absolutely sure? I don’t mean to hammer the point, but I know filming can be tough on a car, even if it’s only carrying the crew. Look, here are the boundaries: you can drive it through a gravel parking lot, but you can’t go charging around a quarry.

Customer: That’s absolutely reasonable. I can guarantee we won’t go charging around a quarry in your Range Rover Sport.

Clerk: Okay then, sign here please.

At least, that’s how I imagine the conversation went when a runner from The Grand Tour’s production team picked up a rental Range Rover Sport. And on the basis of this video, here’s how I imagine the conversation went when it was dropped back at the office:

Customer: Here’s the keys. I can’t stop, I've got to run, but if there’s any problems just call the office. They’ll sort it out. I’ve got to run, sorry.

Clerk: Wait, I need you to si… Oh, they've gone.

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